It's been a few weeks since I've sat down to really commune with the blogosphere. I've been so busy lately, that I've posted but haven't really read beyond the sensational.
So tonight I have some time to just sit in my office and enjoy the water and listen to Kate Bush and relax.
With some blogs. heh
When you put yourself in ridiculous positions like that (relaxing with blogs), you end up finding the most incredible things. So, last week, Ross Mayfield posted a requiem for his friend and mentor Lennart Meri. It's a very short and touching piece, respectful and sober.
How he taught me to speak slowly to be heard, act ethically for more than character, believe in freedom that is always at stake and showed me how diverse, deep and delightful life could be. He was, in a word, inspiring.
There's a quality to relationship described that shows depth - a depth that can only be acheived through long exposure. Through reflection. And through spending enough time with someone to let them surprise you.
In the tech world we are at full speed all the time. Ajax and Ruby weren't even glimmers in their makers eyes a year ago and now they are at the forefront of net development. Web 2.0 applications come onto the market, gather speed and are bought up by the megas at a dizzying pace. We have to study all the time to keep up with tech-fashion.
This leaves little time for long exposure, reflection, and spending enough time with people to let them surprise you.
And people is what Web 2.0 is supposed to be all about. Collaboration is just another word for people. To focus on people is why we nuked the drive for raw efficiency.
In the 90s, I was a part of the phenomenon (now largely forgotten) of the NAMES project AIDS Memorial Quilt. Over my eight year involvement, I helped people memorialize those they lost. I helped families deal with grief and confusion and great helpings of mixed emotions.
From that I learned how uncommon it was for someone to have an experience like Ross'. Many people were grieving, but they were also coming together to learn about people for the first time. Parents who had disowned children, met their children's friends and worked together after their death. People who should have, by definition, known the deceased better than anyone, would gather and learn. To learn and create a memorial.
One definition of Sobriety is: Gravity in bearing, manner, or treatment.
It's not a normal state for people. We often get shocked into it by having something we took for granted unexpectedly denied to us. Not surprising, it's antedote is to pay attention. To value the conversation as the people involved in the conversation - and not merely the posts. To take things slowly in order to learn from what people do and not just what they say. Most wisdom cannot be quoted. It's what we learn when people aren't talking.
Ross learned from Meri's bearing. He was touched by his humanity.
Friends of people memorialized in the Quilt did the same and then related those reflections to their family who missed their chance.
So my reflection tonight as the sun sets and dims my view of Lake Union is .... don't let the conversation become more important than the participants. Don't let the technology outweigh the relationships. Let's find the hidden Meri in everyone we meet.
Thanks, Ross.
Photo: Jim Benson, NAMES Project
Technorati Tags: Web 2.0, AIDS, NAMES Project, Quilt, Lennart Meri
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